The Re-birth of the Stupid Newfie

[A version of the following was published by The Telegram on 8 May 2013]


The Re-birth of the Stupid Newfie

by

Jeff Rose-Martland

The Dunderdale government likes to yammer on about investing in our future: hydropower and industry and jobs galore.  A future of resources and trade and high employment.  A debt-free future, according to their budget.  But do they care what kind of Newfoundlanders will live that future?

Harken back to the early- to mid-20^th century.  Newfoundlanders were the butt of jokes throughout Canada, if not the world - The Newfie Joke.  The jokes revolved around a central theme: the Stupid Newfie.  Sometimes, the protagonist was someone so dense that simple situations were beyond their grasp.  Most often, the Stupid Newfie had a great deal of common sense, but was ignorant, unworldly, and uneducated.  The character would attempt to apply this simple reasoning to complex situations.  Oh, the hilarity.

Those jokes had some basis in fact.  After all, Newfoundlanders during that time were, by and large, uneducated academically.  They fled poverty to distant locations for jobs.  Newfoundlanders brought our hard working nature, but also our tendency to dive in, even when over our heads, especially if there’s money involved.  Anyone faced with a brand-new situation is likely to say or do the wrong thing, and Newfoundlanders are an especially humorous people, so it is easy to see how comic situations might result.  But the Newfie joke quickly morphed into a vehicle of bias and intolerance, with the people of this province branded ‘stupid’.

We have had a long, hard fight against that reputation.  We object to the term ‘Newfie’ as offensive.  We are quick to point out the cutting-edge medicine, science and engineering being done here.  We boast of Memorial University’s rank as a top-notch school.  We push the message that the Stupid Newfie is no more.  We are winning, but have not yet won.

The Dunderdale government is going to resurrect the Stupid Newfie.  Amongst all the talk of resource projects and deficit reduction, the PCs are acting to turn us ignorant again.  And, with only limited objections, we are happily boarding the train with them back to Stupid Newfoundland.

Adult Basic Education – a program designed to help anyone who dropped out of high-school.  Not so many years ago, ABE had been handled by private institutions.  They dropped the program because they couldn’t make enough money.  It was government that moved ABE into CONA, to ensure the program would be available throughout the province to those who need it.  By dumping ABE back to the private sector, Kathy Dunderdale has effectively killed the program - it won’t be too long before private schools announce - again - that Adult Basic Education is not profitable.

Lack of ABE programs will mean more people stuck with whatever education they got when they quit grade school; low education is a primary qualification for the Stupid Newfie.

Then there’s the libraries.  We have 96 of them.  We need more because libraries are wonderful places.  First, everything is free – something one appreciates in this crazy world of unreliable income.  Second, libraries don’t just have books; they have videos and music and Internet.  The are one-stop-shops for entertainment.  Libraries also host courses, sessions, groups, lectures, readings – all sorts of ways to have fun and learn more. 

Also, the Librarian.  (That’s capitalized because it should be a title, not a job description.)  Librarians are rare people.  They not only know things, they know how to learn more about things.  They hold the keys to finding out anything you ever wanted to know.  They might appear to spend their time tidying the books and calling the overdue borrowers.  They may seem to be quiet people armed with date-stampers.  But Librarians are some of the most important people in our society.  Librarians are the guardians of all our accumulated knowledge. 

Disagree?  Go ask one a question.  Any question.  You’ll get the answer, in detail, with annotations and cross-references.  And an Librarian doesn’t care if you are 6 and in Grade 1, 46 and a doctor, or 86 and a war vet.  They will help anyone, free of charge.  Because a Librarian is your guide through the Kingdom of Knowledge. 

But Kathy Dunderdale doesn’t think that’s important.   She must feel that librarians are not important for our future, since she laid off 40% of them.  Plus support staff - assistant librarians and IT people.  And she cut the modest wages of those who remain, making this an even less-attractive field.  Libraries, we have been assured, will still have funding for books and will remain open.  How that is going to work?  There won’t be a Librarian to buy the books, nor assistants to man the counter and keep the doors open.. 

The system has already been scuttled; the Conservatives have rendered libraries unsustainable.  In five years, maybe less, government will be able to closing the doors, claiming lack of use.  Which there will be, as out-of-date materials, lack of programming, erratic hours, and, above all, no Librarians to guide people all combine to drive patrons away.

That doesn’t matter to the PCs.  After all, libraries don’t generate revenue.  Neither does sitting in a classroom - one need only look at the number of education cuts to see government’s view on that.  Dunderdale is promising jobs while slashing away at the tools we need to obtain that employment.  Are we to become janitors at Muskrat Falls?  General labourers for rich, Come-from-Away bosses?  Is she planning on making a personal fortune selling Newfie Joke Books?

If we really are concerned about our future, if we really want to excel and exceed, then we need to have smart, educated people.  The way to get them is to invest in education and libraries.  Learning needs to be available to all, not just those with funds.  Otherwise, the rich get educations and the poor get ignorant.

The Dunderdale Government says it cares about our future, but its actions are ensuring we will only have one role in it: The Stupid Newfie.

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Jeff Rose-Martland is an award-winning author, member of the Newfoundland Writers’ Guild, and recipient of the Queens Diamond Jubilee Medal for his work advocating for veterans.